datingindc

I pose the question can married men and single women be friends? In certain cases I think that’s fine and permissible but as long that there is no flirting involved! And if I am the single woman in question I would like to meet your wife or know your wife! I am friends with a handful of married men and they usually are people who I’ve met in school or through some school function or through work. In almost every case they have mentioned their significant others who often come up in conversation. As a result they become by default my male friend who I ask for advice or for translating purposes. For example, met this guy,…he did this,…he said that,..what the heck does that mean? And they tell me or they tell me I’m f***ing up in some way or I’m choosing the wrong option. With that being said I think men who are married should disclose fairly quickly upon meeting someone that they think is single that they are in fact married!

I met X on line at a House appropriations mark up. He was standing in front of me and I just asked him if it was the mark up for so and so bill and he said yes. I then proceeded to say thanks and dug out my CQ Daily and proceeded to read. He was trying to do the same I think. When the committee staffer who was running the mark up in terms of letting people in came down the line asking if there was anyone here for an agency X said he was from an agency but he didn’t reserve a spot. The guy said there was a separate line for agencies. Feeling sorry for the guy I went to X I will save your spot here if you want to see if you can get in from the other line. He looked at me flabbergasted and didn’t know what to do. I thought as you stand there a person is taking the spot you could have. He I guess dug around for his business card and said thanks I will take you up on your offer and gave me his card and said in case you need a favor in the future.  He actually got in for the mark up as I said he probably would and I emailed him to ask him to keep an ear out of the numbers I needed.  He did end up sending it to me and also picked me up a handout which I thought was nice.  We then started communicating via email and it was incessant since he was at a three day conference.  We went back and forth consistently through out the course of the day and the only time someone has paid this much attention to me is if they were interested.  Otherwise why would you care??? As it turns out HE WAS MARRIED!! And I didn’t end up finding out to a little later after a week or more of emailing, setting up lunch which would be on him since I helped him out, and a walk down around the mall during the Smithsonian Folklife Festival where he ended up walking me back to my office and sent an email an hour later thanking me for going with him and saying that he hoped he didn’t scare me away with his incessant talking about art.  What would you think was going on??? Long story short I remembered seeing him with a clatter ring on his right hand so I asked him about it since if you wear it a certain way it indicates whether or not you are single.  His response was it wasn’t a clatter ring, it was his wedding band.  And my automatic reaction was motherf***er! He thought I saw his wedding band and knew.  WHAT?? I saw you for two seconds the first time and I SWEAR TO G** that you had your left hand hidden or not in view both times I saw you because I of all people notice those things automatically!  And I proceeded to then put to a halt that developing “friendship” as he called it.  The long and short of it is if you want to be my friend,…then let me meet your wife! I think it’s highly suspect when people do not EVER mention their spouse! I just think that’s kind of strange.  If I were married I would think it kind of odd that my husband was out there cultivating friendships with single women that he didn’t already know from someplace else like college, grad school, or work.  I would hope that my boyfriend or husband would talk about me more than this guy mentioned his wife which was all but a big fat zero! I have been in other situations where guys you start talking to mention their wives or girlfriends shortly upon me meeting them so there is no confusion and although I didn’t appreciate it then I APPRECIATE IT NOW!!! Someone please tell me how I keep attracting these married men who think it would be cool to just hang out and not mention the fact that they took vows with someone else along the lines of till death do us part!

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